Edna: Hardships and Harder Decisions — The Indomitable Force of A Mother’s Love Uplifted by Her Community

Being part of a community is important. It keeps me strong and resilient as I work persistently toward my goals. No matter how difficult life becomes, don’t give up — keep going. Be an independent woman. Surround yourself with people who make you better, and be with those who respect you.

- Edna

My name is Edna Salem. I gave birth to my first child when I was just 18 years old. I was not married then. My boyfriend was initially very loving and caring, but I later discovered that he was having an affair. I didn’t believe it until I discovered them in the bedroom together. They jumped out of the window when I tried to enter the bedroom. 

When my boyfriend’s mother found out he was having an affair, she told us to get married. Because I was very young at the time, I just followed what I was told. I thought he would stop seeing the other woman after we got married, but it became worse. So I decided to leave him.

After 3 months, my husband asked me to forgive him. I did so even though I learnt that he had gotten the other woman pregnant. We had two more children together, but he still didn’t take any responsibility or plan for our family’s future.  I realised I had to work to support my kids, so through a friend, I connected with an agency in Singapore.

My husband never supported my decision to work overseas. On the day of my flight, he took all my belongings and locked me inside his sister’s house. I managed to escape by begging the neighbours for help and running to the agency, but he tried to force me to go back home when he found me again.

Because of the commotion, the police came. He told them that he refused to allow me to go to Singapore as I should stay home and look after our children. The police sided with him at first, but fortunately, I was able to speak to a senior police officer who understood that I needed to work overseas as my husband had no job to support the family.

After I left, my husband started spreading lies about me to the children in his anger.  He told them I abandoned them, and that I had another family in Singapore. I finally decided to file for separation.  

When I started working abroad, my youngest daughter was only one year old. As a mother, all I wanted was to raise my children by myself. Having to take care of my employer’s children while my own were far away, growing up without me, is the saddest part of my story.

My life is better now. I am supporting my youngest child through her studies in civil engineering, and my other daughter has graduated from a prestigious university in Architecture. Because I know what it feels like to have nothing, I believe strongly in giving back. I enjoy volunteering and joining activities and workshops. These things give me strength.

Being part of a community is important. It keeps me strong and resilient as I work persistently toward my goals. No matter how difficult life becomes, don’t give up — keep going. Be an independent woman. Surround yourself with people who make you better, and be with those who respect you. In everything you do, pray and ask God for guidance.